Evaluation Report for General Writing Task 2 Problem/Solution Essay Submission
Essay Evaluation
Question: Water scarcity is a pressing issue in many regions. What measures can governments and communities take to conserve water resources and ensure access to clean water for all?
In the current era, from pole to pole, the scarcity of clean water is becoming a worldwide issue of growing significance. The problem of lack of fresh water is caused by human activities and can result in ecological disorders. The possible solutions to this problem will be discussed in the following paragraphs.
To begin with, these days as a result of human activities and global warming, access to Safe drinking liquid resources becomes challenging. There is no denying the fact that water is an urgent need not only for people but also as well as for animals and plants. Therefore, filtered drinks are an integral part of the ecological cycle. For instance, drinking contaminated liquids makes a contribution to livestock disease and causes human disease. Moreover, these issues would affect the agricultural system as well as the financial resources of countries.
In this case, several measures need to be taken to overcome this problem. First of all, the immediate adoption by the government and regulatory authorities of the measures necessary to implement a strict environmental protection policy. Secondly, plant more trees as they reduce runoff and allow droplets to seep into the ground. Collecting rainwater is an additional explanation, no matter how much rain falls, if you keep it, it will improve the situation. It is equally important to preserve aqua bodies. For example, the government should encourage the digging of more wells and ponds. By following small measures and solutions we preserve and use them.
To sum up, according to what has already been discussed, the government, as well as individuals, should make all attempts to save planet resources at any cost. Thus investigations have shown that a healthy drink shortage has become one of the biggest problems in the world.
To begin with, these days as a result of human activities and global warming, access to Safe drinking liquid resources becomes challenging. There is no denying the fact that water is an urgent need not only for people but also as well as for animals and plants. Therefore, filtered drinks are an integral part of the ecological cycle. For instance, drinking contaminated liquids makes a contribution to livestock disease and causes human disease. Moreover, these issues would affect the agricultural system as well as the financial resources of countries.
In this case, several measures need to be taken to overcome this problem. First of all, the immediate adoption by the government and regulatory authorities of the measures necessary to implement a strict environmental protection policy. Secondly, plant more trees as they reduce runoff and allow droplets to seep into the ground. Collecting rainwater is an additional explanation, no matter how much rain falls, if you keep it, it will improve the situation. It is equally important to preserve aqua bodies. For example, the government should encourage the digging of more wells and ponds. By following small measures and solutions we preserve and use them.
To sum up, according to what has already been discussed, the government, as well as individuals, should make all attempts to save planet resources at any cost. Thus investigations have shown that a healthy drink shortage has become one of the biggest problems in the world.
Submitted on August 3, 2024 at 8:00 AM
Overall Evaluation
7 Bands
Your essay addresses the critical issue of water scarcity and outlines several measures that governments and communities can take to conserve water resources. You effectively highlight the importance of water for all living beings and the ecological cycle, and you propose practical solutions such as implementing strict environmental protection policies, planting more trees, collecting rainwater, and preserving water bodies. However, your essay could benefit from clearer organization and more detailed explanation of how these measures can be implemented. Additionally, providing specific examples or case studies where such measures have been successful could strengthen your argument. Pay attention to minor grammatical errors and aim for more varied sentence structures to enhance readability. Overall, you have made a commendable effort in addressing a pressing global issue.
In this part of essay evaluation, state of the art AI and ML algorithms trained on millions of essays analyze how well you have performed on all fronts of IELTS writing task 2 band descriptors.
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7
Coherence & Cohesion
6.5 Bands
In this part of essay evaluation, the laser-focused algorithms meticulously examine your essay’s structure, ensuring your ideas flow logically and cohesively.
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Logical Organization
Your essay has a clear structure with an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion, which is good for logical organization. However, the flow of ideas between paragraphs could be improved for better coherence. Overall, the logical organization is decent, but there's room for enhancement. Band: 6.5
Good Sentence(s)
To begin with, these days as a result of human activities and global warming, access to Safe drinking liquid resources becomes challenging.
This sentence effectively sets up the discussion for the paragraph, clearly linking human activities and global warming to the issue at hand.
Bad Sentence(s)
Collecting rainwater is an additional explanation, no matter how much rain falls, if you keep it, it will improve the situation.
Corrected Sentence:
Additionally, collecting rainwater, regardless of the quantity, can significantly mitigate the issue by providing an alternative source of clean water.
Additionally, collecting rainwater, regardless of the quantity, can significantly mitigate the issue by providing an alternative source of clean water.
Clarify the idea and connect it more smoothly to the previous and following sentences.
Suggestions
To enhance logical progression, make sure each paragraph focuses on a single main idea. Use clear topic sentences at the beginning of paragraphs and transitional phrases between ideas to guide the reader more smoothly from one point to the next.
Paragraphing
Your paragraphs are structured around central ideas, which is positive. However, some paragraphs could be more focused, with clearer connections between sentences. Band: 6.0
Good Sentence(s)
In this case, several measures need to be taken to overcome this problem.
This sentence effectively introduces the solutions segment, signaling a shift from problem identification to discussing potential solutions.
Suggestions
For more focused and coherent paragraphs, start each paragraph with a clear topic sentence that states the main idea. Then, ensure each subsequent sentence directly supports or elaborates on that idea. Avoid introducing new topics without proper transition.
Cohesive Devices
Your use of cohesive devices is generally effective, helping to link ideas and paragraphs. However, there's potential for more varied and precise use of these devices to strengthen the cohesion further. Band: 6.5
Good Sentence(s)
To begin with, these days as a result of human activities and global warming, access to Safe drinking liquid resources becomes challenging.
The phrase 'To begin with' effectively signals the start of a detailed discussion, guiding the reader into the essay's argument structure.
Suggestions
To improve your use of cohesive devices, consider incorporating a wider range of expressions for contrast, addition, cause and effect, and exemplification. Also, ensure that the devices you choose accurately reflect the relationship you intend to convey between ideas.
Topic Sentences
Your topic sentences generally introduce the subject matter effectively but could be more specific in outlining the focus of each paragraph.
Good Sentence(s)
In this case, several measures need to be taken to overcome this problem.
This sentence effectively transitions to discussing solutions, clearly indicating the essay's shift towards potential measures for addressing water scarcity.
Bad Sentence(s)
To begin with, these days as a result of human activities and global warming, access to Safe drinking liquid resources becomes challenging.
Corrected Sentence:
To begin with, human activities and global warming have significantly hindered access to safe drinking water.
To begin with, human activities and global warming have significantly hindered access to safe drinking water.
Clarify and directly state the main idea of the paragraph for stronger impact.
Suggestions
For clear and impactful topic sentences, start with a concise statement of the paragraph’s main idea. Follow this by briefly introducing how you will explore or support this idea in the rest of the paragraph.
Counter Points
Your essay does not explicitly address contrasting viewpoints or counterarguments, focusing instead on presenting solutions to water scarcity.
Suggestions
To integrate counterarguments effectively, identify potential objections to your proposed solutions and address them directly. This could involve discussing the feasibility, cost, or potential drawbacks of the measures you suggest, followed by a reasoned explanation of why these measures remain the best option.
Task Achievement
6.5 Bands
Overall, you have a solid understanding of the task and have provided relevant solutions to the issue of water scarcity. However, your essay would benefit from more detailed examples and a stronger conclusion. Aim to integrate specific evidence or case studies to support your points and ensure your conclusion powerfully encapsulates your argument.
In this part of essay evaluation, the system evaluates how effectively your essay fulfills the given question, focusing on its relevance and comprehensiveness.
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Response to Question
You addressed the question directly by discussing the significance of water scarcity and proposing measures to conserve water resources. Your essay aligns well with the task requirements.
Good example(s)
Collecting rainwater is an additional explanation, no matter how much rain falls, if you keep it, it will improve the situation.
This sentence provides a practical solution to the issue, directly answering the essay question.
Development of Position
Your argument is clear but could be strengthened with more specific examples and a deeper exploration of how these measures can be implemented.
Good example(s)
First of all, the immediate adoption by the government and regulatory authorities of the measures necessary to implement a strict environmental protection policy.
This sentence clearly states a measure that could help address the problem, showing good development of your position.
Supporting Details
Your examples are relevant but somewhat generic. Including specific case studies or data could enhance the persuasiveness of your argument.
Good example(s)
For instance, drinking contaminated liquids makes a contribution to livestock disease and causes human disease.
This detail supports your argument by showing the consequences of water scarcity on health.
Conclusion
Your conclusion summarizes the essay well but lacks a strong final statement that emphasizes the urgency of the issue and the need for immediate action.
Bad Example(s)
Thus investigations have shown that a healthy drink shortage has become one of the biggest problems in the world.
This sentence is too general and does not effectively conclude your argument or suggest a call to action.
Lexical Resources
6.5 Bands
Your essay demonstrates a fair range of vocabulary relevant to the topic of water scarcity and conservation measures. However, there are areas where lexical precision and variety could be improved to enhance clarity and avoid repetition. Incorporating a wider range of specific terms related to water conservation and environmental policy could strengthen your argument and make your essay more compelling.
In this part of essay evaluation, the AI browses through 1,70,000+ words to analyze the diversity, suitability, and precision, reflecting high linguistic competence.
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Errors & Improvements
Based on the essay question, We have curated a list of suggested vocabulary that can improve the versatility of your writing skill. Utilise these words in your next essay to get your desired bands.
Lexical Mistakes
| Mistake | Correction | Reason |
|---|---|---|
| Safe drinking liquid resources | Safe drinking water resources | The original phrase is overly wordy and slightly awkward; 'water' is more direct and clear. |
| filtered drinks | filtered water | In the context of water scarcity, 'filtered water' is the accurate term; 'drinks' suggests a variety of beverages. |
| aqua bodies | water bodies | 'Aqua bodies' is not a standard term; 'water bodies' is the correct environmental term. |
Repeated Words
| Repeated Words | Alternative Words |
|---|---|
problem 4 times | issue, challenge, dilemma, crisis |
Vocabulary Suggestions
| Word Phrase | Meaning |
|---|---|
| sustainable water management The careful planning, developing, distributing, and managing of water resources in a sustainable way. | The careful planning, developing, distributing, and managing of water resources in a sustainable way. |
| desalination The process of removing salt from seawater to make it safe for drinking and irrigation. | The process of removing salt from seawater to make it safe for drinking and irrigation. |
| rainwater harvesting The collection and storage of rain, rather than allowing it to run off, to be used for various purposes. | The collection and storage of rain, rather than allowing it to run off, to be used for various purposes. |
| water conservation The practice of using water efficiently to reduce unnecessary water usage. | The practice of using water efficiently to reduce unnecessary water usage. |
| aquifer recharge A process by which the water table is replenished by directing water back into the ground to recharge underground aquifers. | A process by which the water table is replenished by directing water back into the ground to recharge underground aquifers. |
Grammatical Range
7.5 Bands
Overall, your grammar is strong, but attention to detail is necessary to avoid minor errors. Specifically, watch for correct terminology (e.g., 'safe drinking water' instead of 'safe drinking liquid') and tense agreement to ensure clarity and precision in your writing. Additionally, consider the most appropriate verbs for formal writing ('encourage the construction' rather than 'encourage the digging'). These adjustments will elevate the quality of your essay.
In this part of essay evaluation, the ML algorithms evaluate sentence structure, scrutinizing for grammatical precision and diversity — crucial for advanced language skills.
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Sentence Structures
Your essay demonstrates a good range of sentence structures, including complex and compound sentences, which enhances the readability and sophistication of your writing.
Good example(s)
For instance, drinking contaminated liquids makes a contribution to livestock disease and causes human disease.
This sentence effectively uses a complex structure to present a cause-and-effect relationship, which adds depth to your argument.
Tense Usage
Your use of tenses is generally consistent and correct, maintaining a balance between present simple for general truths and future simple for proposed solutions.
Good example(s)
Collecting rainwater is an additional explanation, no matter how much rain falls, if you keep it, it will improve the situation.
This sentence correctly uses the present simple tense to describe a general action (collecting rainwater) and the future simple tense to predict an outcome (it will improve the situation), demonstrating good control over tense usage.
Grammatical Errors
To begin with, these days as a result of human activities and global warming, access to Safe drinking liquid resources becomes challenging.
Correction:
To begin with, these days, as a result of human activities and global warming, access to safe drinking water resources has become challenging.
To begin with, these days, as a result of human activities and global warming, access to safe drinking water resources has become challenging.
The original sentence has punctuation issues and uses 'Safe drinking liquid' instead of the more appropriate 'safe drinking water'. 'Becomes' should be 'has become' for correct tense agreement.
Therefore, filtered drinks are an integral part of the ecological cycle.
Correction:
Therefore, filtered water is an integral part of the ecological cycle.
Therefore, filtered water is an integral part of the ecological cycle.
'Filtered drinks' is an inaccurate term; 'filtered water' is the correct term to use in this context.
For example, the government should encourage the digging of more wells and ponds.
Correction:
For example, the government should encourage the construction of more wells and ponds.
For example, the government should encourage the construction of more wells and ponds.
'Digging' is too specific and informal in this context; 'construction' is more appropriate for the formal tone of an essay.