Evaluation Report for General Writing Task 2 Advantage/Disadvantage Essay Submission
Essay Evaluation
Question: Discuss the advantages and disadvantages of promoting eco-friendly tourism practices, such as ecotourism and sustainable travel.
In today's world the eco-friendly tourism practices such as ecotourism and sustainable travel are gaining widespread acceptance, but this practice have both advantages and disadvantages. Arguments stating both the advantages and disadvantages are stated below with the conclusion.
Today there are variety of attractions for tourist and many people now opt for the eco-friendly tourist practices as this may have benefits for all the people travelling, the society and mainly for the environment or the natural areas covered during the tourism. These days many people are concerned for the environment and the sustainibility of the societies, for which various programs are initiated for responsible travelling to natural areas, conducting various education programs and interpretations.
Despite having many advantages to the eco friendly travelling practice many people tends to find the disadvantages too for the same. As many people find such tourist practices as expensive as compared to the normal travelling practices also some people may find it as restricting them to travel freely as they want.
At the end we can conclude that eco-friendly tourists practices are widely accepted with lots of benefits provided for all like the people, the societies, etc but also carries some disadvantages for the same.
Today there are variety of attractions for tourist and many people now opt for the eco-friendly tourist practices as this may have benefits for all the people travelling, the society and mainly for the environment or the natural areas covered during the tourism. These days many people are concerned for the environment and the sustainibility of the societies, for which various programs are initiated for responsible travelling to natural areas, conducting various education programs and interpretations.
Despite having many advantages to the eco friendly travelling practice many people tends to find the disadvantages too for the same. As many people find such tourist practices as expensive as compared to the normal travelling practices also some people may find it as restricting them to travel freely as they want.
At the end we can conclude that eco-friendly tourists practices are widely accepted with lots of benefits provided for all like the people, the societies, etc but also carries some disadvantages for the same.
Submitted on July 11, 2024 at 6:49 AM
Overall Evaluation
5.5 Bands
Your essay provides a basic overview of the advantages and disadvantages of eco-friendly tourism practices, which is a good start. However, it lacks depth in analysis and specific examples to strengthen your arguments. Your introduction and conclusion are clear, but they could be more engaging and informative. To improve, consider adding more detailed examples of eco-friendly tourism practices and their direct benefits or drawbacks. Also, work on expanding your discussion to include more varied perspectives and possibly statistical evidence or case studies to support your points. Your writing structure is decent, but pay attention to sentence variety and complexity to make your essay more compelling. Lastly, be mindful of minor grammatical errors and aim for clarity in your argumentation to achieve a higher band score.
In this part of essay evaluation, state of the art AI and ML algorithms trained on millions of essays analyze how well you have performed on all fronts of IELTS writing task 2 band descriptors.
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5.5
Coherence & Cohesion
5 Bands
Your essay demonstrates a basic structure of introduction, body, and conclusion, which aids in its overall coherence and cohesion. However, transitions between advantages and disadvantages could be smoother to enhance the flow of your argument. Additionally, providing specific examples or evidence within each section would strengthen the coherence, making your arguments more compelling and easier to follow.
In this part of essay evaluation, the laser-focused algorithms meticulously examine your essay’s structure, ensuring your ideas flow logically and cohesively.
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Logical Organization
Your essay has a basic structure that includes an introduction, body paragraphs discussing advantages and disadvantages, and a conclusion. However, the development of ideas could be more detailed and specific. Overall, the logical flow is present but lacks depth. Band: 6.0
Good Sentence(s)
In today's world, the eco-friendly tourism practices such as ecotourism and sustainable travel are gaining widespread acceptance, but this practice have both advantages and disadvantages.
This sentence effectively sets the stage for the discussion by introducing the topic and indicating that both pros and cons will be explored.
Bad Sentence(s)
Arguments stating both the advantages and disadvantages are stated below with the conclusion.
Corrected Sentence:
This essay will explore the benefits of eco-friendly tourism, such as environmental preservation and community support, alongside potential drawbacks, including higher costs and accessibility issues.
This essay will explore the benefits of eco-friendly tourism, such as environmental preservation and community support, alongside potential drawbacks, including higher costs and accessibility issues.
Clarify and directly introduce the main points rather than using a generic statement.
Suggestions
To enhance logical progression, clearly outline your main points in the introduction and use topic sentences at the beginning of each paragraph. This will guide the reader through your argument more effectively.
Paragraphing
Your paragraphs are structured around a central theme, but they could be more clearly delineated and developed. Each paragraph should focus on a single idea with supporting details. Band: 6.0
Bad Sentence(s)
Despite having many advantages to the eco friendly travelling practice many people tends to find the disadvantages too for the same.
Corrected Sentence:
Despite its many advantages, eco-friendly traveling also has disadvantages. For example, some people find such practices more expensive compared to conventional travel.
Despite its many advantages, eco-friendly traveling also has disadvantages. For example, some people find such practices more expensive compared to conventional travel.
Split complex ideas into separate sentences for clarity and focus on a single idea per paragraph.
Suggestions
Focus on developing one main idea per paragraph. Start with a topic sentence, follow with supporting evidence or examples, and conclude with a sentence that summarizes the paragraph's main point or links to the next paragraph.
Cohesive Devices
Your use of cohesive devices is basic and could be improved for better flow and clarity. Band: 5.5
Bad Sentence(s)
These days many people are concerned for the environment and the sustainibility of the societies, for which various programs are initiated for responsible travelling to natural areas, conducting various education programs and interpretations.
Corrected Sentence:
Consequently, due to growing environmental concerns, numerous initiatives aim to promote responsible travel through educational programs and sustainable practices.
Consequently, due to growing environmental concerns, numerous initiatives aim to promote responsible travel through educational programs and sustainable practices.
Use more specific cohesive devices to link ideas smoothly.
Suggestions
Improve your use of cohesive devices by incorporating a variety of transitions such as 'furthermore,' 'however,' and 'consequently.' Also, refer back to previously mentioned ideas to create a more connected argument.
Topic Sentences
Your topic sentences introduce the subject matter effectively but could be improved by more clearly delineating the advantages and disadvantages of eco-friendly tourism practices.
Good Sentence(s)
Today there are variety of attractions for tourist and many people now opt for the eco-friendly tourist practices as this may have benefits for all the people travelling, the society and mainly for the environment or the natural areas covered during the tourism.
This sentence effectively introduces the advantages of eco-friendly tourism, highlighting its benefits for travelers, society, and the environment.
Bad Sentence(s)
Despite having many advantages to the eco friendly travelling practice many people tends to find the disadvantages too for the same.
Corrected Sentence:
However, eco-friendly tourism practices also present disadvantages, including higher costs and restrictions on traveler freedom.
However, eco-friendly tourism practices also present disadvantages, including higher costs and restrictions on traveler freedom.
Clarify and directly state the disadvantages to make the topic sentence more impactful.
Suggestions
For clear and impactful topic sentences, directly state the main advantage or disadvantage you will discuss in the paragraph. Use specific, concise language that previews the paragraph’s content.
Counter Points
You have acknowledged the existence of contrasting viewpoints but could improve by providing more detailed examples and analysis of these counterpoints.
Bad Sentence(s)
As many people find such tourist practices as expensive as compared to the normal travelling practices also some people may find it as restricting them to travel freely as they want.
Corrected Sentence:
One major disadvantage is the higher costs associated with eco-friendly tourism compared to traditional travel. Additionally, some travelers may feel that these practices impose restrictions on their freedom to explore.
One major disadvantage is the higher costs associated with eco-friendly tourism compared to traditional travel. Additionally, some travelers may feel that these practices impose restrictions on their freedom to explore.
Expand on this sentence to offer specific examples or data supporting the disadvantages, and separate the ideas for clarity.
Suggestions
To address and integrate counterarguments more effectively, explicitly state the counterpoint, provide evidence or examples to support it, and then offer a rebuttal or explanation of how the advantages might outweigh these disadvantages. This structure will help your argument to be more balanced and persuasive.
Task Achievement
5 Bands
You have made an effort to cover the task by discussing both sides of eco-friendly tourism practices. However, your essay would benefit from more specific examples, deeper analysis, and a clearer development of your arguments. Additionally, working on the structure and coherence of your essay will help in effectively conveying your message. Paying attention to these aspects can significantly improve your performance.
In this part of essay evaluation, the system evaluates how effectively your essay fulfills the given question, focusing on its relevance and comprehensiveness.
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Response to Question
You addressed the question by discussing both advantages and disadvantages of eco-friendly tourism practices. However, the depth and specificity of your discussion could be improved to fully hit the mark.
Development of Position
Your argument presents a general overview but lacks depth and specific examples to make your point clear and strong. Developing each point with more detailed examples and explanations would enhance your argument.
Supporting Details
The examples and details you provided are somewhat generic. Including more specific, real-world examples and statistics could strengthen your argument and make it more convincing.
Conclusion
Your conclusion summarizes the essay but it could be more impactful with a stronger statement of your overall viewpoint or a call to action.
Lexical Resources
6 Bands
Your essay provides a basic overview of the advantages and disadvantages of eco-friendly tourism practices. However, the lexical range is somewhat limited, and the essay could benefit from a wider variety of vocabulary to express ideas more precisely and engagingly. Additionally, there are instances of repetition and some awkward phrasing that could be improved for clarity and impact.
In this part of essay evaluation, the AI browses through 1,70,000+ words to analyze the diversity, suitability, and precision, reflecting high linguistic competence.
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Errors & Improvements
Based on the essay question, We have curated a list of suggested vocabulary that can improve the versatility of your writing skill. Utilise these words in your next essay to get your desired bands.
Lexical Mistakes
| Mistake | Correction | Reason |
|---|---|---|
| practice have | practices have | Subject-verb agreement error; the subject 'practice' is plural, so the verb should be 'have'. |
| sustainibility | sustainability | Spelling error. |
| travelling | traveling | Although 'travelling' is correct in British English, consistency in American or British English spelling should be maintained throughout the essay. If the rest of the essay uses American English, it should be 'traveling'. |
Repeated Words
| Repeated Words | Alternative Words |
|---|---|
practices 5 times | approaches, methods, strategies |
advantages 3 times | benefits, positives, merits |
disadvantages 3 times | drawbacks, negatives, downsides |
Vocabulary Suggestions
| Word Phrase | Meaning |
|---|---|
| widespread acceptance General approval or adoption. | General approval or adoption. |
| sustainable travel Travel practices that consider and preserve the environment, economy, and social and cultural aspects of the community. | Travel practices that consider and preserve the environment, economy, and social and cultural aspects of the community. |
| responsible travelling Traveling in a way that is conscious of environmental, social, and economic impacts. | Traveling in a way that is conscious of environmental, social, and economic impacts. |
| natural areas Regions that are preserved for their environmental value and for recreation. | Regions that are preserved for their environmental value and for recreation. |
Grammatical Range
6.5 Bands
Your grammar shows a good foundation, but there are areas for improvement. Paying attention to subject-verb agreement and the correct use of prepositions can significantly enhance your writing. Additionally, watch out for spelling errors and try to vary your sentence structures more to improve the flow and readability of your essay.
In this part of essay evaluation, the ML algorithms evaluate sentence structure, scrutinizing for grammatical precision and diversity — crucial for advanced language skills.
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Sentence Structures
Your sentences show some variety but could benefit from more complexity and variation in structure to enhance readability and engagement. Incorporating a mix of simple, compound, and complex sentences can make your essay more dynamic.
Good example(s)
Despite having many advantages to the eco friendly travelling practice many people tends to find the disadvantages too for the same.
This sentence attempts to balance both sides of the argument, showing an effort to structure sentences that present a nuanced view.
Bad Example(s)
Arguments stating both the advantages and disadvantages are stated below with the conclusion.
This sentence is overly passive and vague. It could be more engaging by directly stating the arguments or by using active voice.
Tense Usage
Your use of tenses is generally consistent and correct, focusing on the present simple to discuss current trends and general truths about eco-friendly tourism. However, be mindful of maintaining this consistency throughout.
Good example(s)
These days many people are concerned for the environment and the sustainability of the societies.
This sentence correctly uses the present simple tense to describe current general concerns, which is appropriate for the essay's context.
Grammatical Errors
but this practice have both advantages and disadvantages
Correction:
but this practice has both advantages and disadvantages
but this practice has both advantages and disadvantages
The subject 'practice' is singular, so the verb should be 'has' not 'have'.
many people tends to find
Correction:
many people tend to find
many people tend to find
With the plural subject 'many people', the verb should be 'tend' not 'tends'.
concerned for the environment
Correction:
concerned about the environment
concerned about the environment
The correct preposition for expressing worry or care about something is 'about' not 'for'.
the sustainibility of the societies
Correction:
the sustainability of societies
the sustainability of societies
Spelling mistake in 'sustainability' and unnecessary use of 'the' before 'societies'.