Evaluation Report for General Writing Task 2 Discussion Essay Submission

Essay Evaluation

Question: Satellite technology plays a critical role in communication, navigation, and weather forecasting. Analyze the significance of satellites in modern society.

The world has become a global village, one of the reasons behind this increasing globalization is the development of satellites. It is the satellite systems that have made possible the modern ways in which we communicate with each other, navigate the world around us, and analyze weather possibilities. This essay will discuss the crucial part satellites play in today's world.

First of all, the most important thing that this advanced machinery has made so much easier for us is communication. It is the basic requirement of our day-to-day lives, and it is hard to imagine a single day without it. Today, we are able to talk to anyone despite the geographical barriers, that is because cell phones and online communication has shrunk distances. Whether, we want to talk to our loved ones living across the seven seas, or stay in constant touch with them, none of these is a problem in the modern civilization because of the invention of satellites.

Another way satellite technology has transformed our lifestyles is through navigation system. Gone are the days when travelling into unfamiliar cities used to be intimidating, with online maps, we can explore any part of the world without the fear of getting lost. Furthermore, with Google and Apple navigation apps, we can have the 3D maps of any country right in front of our eyes, and familiarize ourselves with the roads and paths even before actually flying to that state. This advanced mapping technology is materialized with help of satellites.

Coming to the weather forecasting, with the advanced machinery in space that foresee all the weather changes possible in coming weeks, humans are able to predict the weather. Knowing about the potential weather changes in the future helps us plan and prepare for it accordingly. This means that we can prepare ourselves to deal with major weather fluctuations, causing natural calamities, as well, which can be life-saving. Moreover, scientists are able to warn us about an upcoming blizzard, tornado, or a massive meteor heading towards earth, due to the reports they receive from satellites. This can help us avoid such catastrophes.

Satellite technology has altered our lives and shaped conventional society in more ways than we know. It has played a big role in the globalization of the world, including making communication, travelling, and preparing for weather changes far easier than they used to be.
Submitted on July 26, 2024 at 4:02 PM

Overall Evaluation

8 Bands
Your essay effectively outlines the significance of satellite technology in modern society, covering key areas such as communication, navigation, and weather forecasting. You have structured your essay well, with a clear introduction, body paragraphs that each focus on a different aspect of satellite technology, and a conclusion that summarizes the essay's main points. Your examples are relevant and help to illustrate the impact of satellite technology on everyday life. To further improve, consider incorporating more specific examples or statistics to support your points, and ensure each paragraph has a clear topic sentence. Additionally, watch for minor grammatical errors and aim for variety in sentence structure to enhance readability. Overall, your essay demonstrates a good understanding of the topic and communicates your ideas clearly.
In this part of essay evaluation, state of the art AI and ML algorithms trained on millions of essays analyze how well you have performed on all fronts of IELTS writing task 2 band descriptors.
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Coherence & Cohesion

7.5 Bands
Your essay demonstrates strong coherence and cohesion. Each paragraph flows logically to the next, with clear transitions ('First of all', 'Another way', 'Coming to') that guide the reader through your argument. The use of examples, such as communication through cell phones and online maps for navigation, effectively supports your points. However, to further improve coherence, you could more explicitly link each aspect of satellite technology to its impact on modern society, reinforcing the overall argument of the essay.
In this part of essay evaluation, the laser-focused algorithms meticulously examine your essay’s structure, ensuring your ideas flow logically and cohesively.
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Logical Organization

Your essay demonstrates a clear structure and logical flow of ideas, effectively analyzing the significance of satellites in modern society. Each paragraph focuses on a specific aspect of satellite technology, contributing to a coherent argument. Overall, the organization of your essay aligns well with the expectations for a high-scoring IELTS essay. Band: 8.5

Good Sentence(s)

Satellite technology has altered our lives and shaped conventional society in more ways than we know.
This sentence effectively summarizes the essay's main points, reinforcing the significance of satellite technology in modern society.

Suggestions

To enhance logical progression in future essays, consider introducing each paragraph with a clear topic sentence that directly relates to the essay question. Also, try to develop a more explicit link between paragraphs, guiding the reader through your argument with phrases that signal the introduction of new ideas or the conclusion of previous ones.

Paragraphing

Your paragraphs are clear and well-structured, each dedicated to a specific aspect of satellite technology's impact on society. This clarity and structure facilitate easy reading and comprehension. Band: 8.5

Good Sentence(s)

Another way satellite technology has transformed our lifestyles is through navigation system.
This sentence effectively introduces the paragraph topic, clearly signaling a shift to discussing a new aspect of satellite technology.

Suggestions

For creating more focused and coherent paragraphs, ensure that each paragraph elaborates on a single main idea. Use examples to support your points and make your paragraphs more engaging. Additionally, consider concluding each paragraph with a sentence that subtly transitions to the next topic or aspect you will discuss.

Cohesive Devices

Your use of cohesive devices is generally effective, helping to link ideas within and across paragraphs smoothly. However, there's room for slight improvement to achieve a more sophisticated use of these devices. Band: 8.0

Good Sentence(s)

First of all, the most important thing that this advanced machinery has made so much easier for us is communication.
This sentence effectively uses a cohesive device ('First of all') to introduce the first main point, guiding the reader through your argument structure.

Suggestions

To improve your use of cohesive devices, consider varying them more throughout your essay. Instead of relying on basic transitions like 'First of all,' 'Another way,' or 'Coming to,' try incorporating synonyms or more complex phrases that might offer subtle nuances in meaning. Additionally, using devices that compare and contrast ideas or indicate cause and effect can add depth to your analysis.

Topic Sentences

Your topic sentences effectively introduce the main idea of each paragraph, clearly outlining the areas your essay will cover: communication, navigation, and weather forecasting.

Good Sentence(s)

First of all, the most important thing that this advanced machinery has made so much easier for us is communication.
This sentence clearly introduces the paragraph's focus on communication, setting a strong foundation for the discussion that follows.
Another way satellite technology has transformed our lifestyles is through navigation system.
It effectively transitions to a new aspect of satellite technology, indicating a shift from communication to navigation.
Coming to the weather forecasting, with the advanced machinery in space that foresee all the weather changes possible in coming weeks, humans are able to predict the weather.
This sentence successfully introduces the topic of weather forecasting, clearly linking it to the capabilities of satellite technology.

Suggestions

To write clear and impactful topic sentences, start with a concise statement that directly states the paragraph's main idea. Then, if necessary, follow up with a brief elaboration or preview of the points to be discussed. Your topic sentences should act as signposts for your readers, guiding them through your argument or analysis.

Counter Points

Your essay does not explicitly address contrasting viewpoints or counterarguments, focusing instead on explaining the benefits of satellite technology.

Suggestions

To integrate counterarguments more effectively, consider acknowledging potential limitations or criticisms of satellite technology, such as privacy concerns or dependency issues. Then, refute these points or discuss how they are being addressed. This approach can enhance the persuasiveness of your essay.

Task Achievement

7.5 Bands
Overall, you have done a commendable job in addressing the task. Your essay is well-organized, with clear examples that illustrate the significance of satellite technology. To improve, consider incorporating more detailed examples or statistics to support your points. Additionally, a stronger conclusion that looks to the future of satellite technology could provide a more compelling finish to your essay.
In this part of essay evaluation, the system evaluates how effectively your essay fulfills the given question, focusing on its relevance and comprehensiveness.
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Response to Question

You have effectively answered the question, demonstrating a clear understanding of the significance of satellite technology in modern society.

Good example(s)

Today, we are able to talk to anyone despite the geographical barriers, that is because cell phones and online communication has shrunk distances.
This sentence clearly illustrates the impact of satellite technology on global communication.

Development of Position

Your argument is well-structured and progresses logically, making your point clear and persuasive.

Good example(s)

Another way satellite technology has transformed our lifestyles is through navigation system.
This sentence transitions smoothly to a new aspect of satellite technology, maintaining the flow of your argument.

Supporting Details

Your examples are relevant and effectively support your argument. However, adding more specific data or case studies could strengthen your essay.

Good example(s)

Furthermore, with Google and Apple navigation apps, we can have the 3D maps of any country right in front of our eyes, and familiarize ourselves with the roads and paths even before actually flying to that state.
This detail effectively demonstrates the practical application of satellite technology in everyday life.

Conclusion

Your conclusion effectively summarizes the essay, but it could be enhanced by emphasizing the future implications of satellite technology.

Good example(s)

Satellite technology has altered our lives and shaped conventional society in more ways than we know.
This sentence effectively encapsulates the overall impact of satellite technology.

Lexical Resources

7.5 Bands
Your essay demonstrates a strong command of English with a variety of sentence structures and a good range of vocabulary relevant to the topic. You effectively communicate the significance of satellite technology in modern society. However, there's room for enhancing the lexical richness further by incorporating more precise and varied terminology related to satellite technology and its applications.
In this part of essay evaluation, the AI browses through 1,70,000+ words to analyze the diversity, suitability, and precision, reflecting high linguistic competence.
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Errors & Improvements

Based on the essay question, We have curated a list of suggested vocabulary that can improve the versatility of your writing skill. Utilise these words in your next essay to get your desired bands.

Repeated Words

Repeated WordsAlternative Words
advanced 2 times
sophisticated, cutting-edge, state-of-the-art
communication 3 times
correspondence, interaction, discourse
weather 3 times
meteorological conditions, climate, atmospheric conditions

Vocabulary Suggestions

Word Phrase
globalization The process by which businesses or other organizations develop international influence or start operating on an international scale.
geographical barriers Natural formations or divisions that prevent or hinder movement or communication.
navigation system A system that accurately determines the position and direction of an object on Earth.
meteorological forecasting The application of science and technology to predict the state of the atmosphere for a future time at a specific location.
natural calamities Severe and unexpected natural events that cause great damage or loss of life, such as floods, hurricanes, and earthquakes.

Grammatical Range

8.5 Bands
Overall, your grammar is strong, showing a solid understanding of complex sentence structures and appropriate tense usage. There are no significant grammatical errors that detract from the clarity or professionalism of your essay. Your ability to articulate ideas clearly and correctly is commendable, contributing to an effective and persuasive argument.
In this part of essay evaluation, the ML algorithms evaluate sentence structure, scrutinizing for grammatical precision and diversity — crucial for advanced language skills.
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Sentence Structures

Your sentences exhibit a good range of complexity and variation, effectively contributing to the clarity and engagement of your essay. The structure supports your arguments well and maintains the reader's interest.

Good example(s)

Whether, we want to talk to our loved ones living across the seven seas, or stay in constant touch with them, none of these is a problem in the modern civilization because of the invention of satellites.
This sentence effectively uses a complex structure to illustrate the impact of satellite technology on communication, showcasing variation in structure and a good balance between clauses.

Tense Usage

The use of tenses throughout the essay is consistent and correct, effectively supporting the narrative and analytical style of the essay. You have successfully used the present tense to discuss current capabilities and impacts of satellite technology.

Good example(s)

Satellite technology has altered our lives and shaped conventional society in more ways than we know.
This use of the present perfect tense correctly implies the ongoing impact of satellite technology, which is both accurate and appropriate for the context.

Grammatical Errors

No Grammatical Errors detected in this essay