Evaluation Report for General Writing Task 2 Discussion Essay Submission
Essay Evaluation
Question: Natural disasters can have long-lasting effects on both the environment and public health. Explore the connection between disaster resilience, environmental conservation, and community well-being.
Over the past couple of decades, owing to the rapid climate change, the world has encountered many natural disasters. These catastrophes can have long-term impacts on our environment as well as public safety. This essay will explore how disaster control can affect environmental preservation and public well-being.
First and foremost, natural catastrophes directly threaten Earth's atmosphere, deteriorating it at a faster rate. For instance, the smoke and fumes from the forest fires increase the air pollution; contributing to global warming, earthquakes can destroy the habitats of animals, and tsunamis can disrupt the life cycles of aquatic fuana. Therefore, it is extremely crucial to control these types of disruptions in nature in order to conserve the already-worsening climate.
As for the communicaty safety, natural disasters can have a direct and far-reaching effects on people's physical, mental, and economic well-being too. Natural catastrophes can destruct and displace entire communities, disrupt the infrastructures of cities, and weaken the economies of states. All these factors can fuel the suffering of masses in numerous ways; not just physically, but mentally and financially as well. Furthermore, it can take a lifetime for a family and decades for governments to overcome the destructions of that magnitude. This emphasizes the importance of disaster resiliance for safety and well-being of the citizens.
Controlling and preparing to mitigate natural disasters is necessary to minimize environmental issues and to ensure public health. Therefore, steps should be taken for disaster resiliance, otherwise the impact can be long-term, long-lasting, and difficult to overcome.
First and foremost, natural catastrophes directly threaten Earth's atmosphere, deteriorating it at a faster rate. For instance, the smoke and fumes from the forest fires increase the air pollution; contributing to global warming, earthquakes can destroy the habitats of animals, and tsunamis can disrupt the life cycles of aquatic fuana. Therefore, it is extremely crucial to control these types of disruptions in nature in order to conserve the already-worsening climate.
As for the communicaty safety, natural disasters can have a direct and far-reaching effects on people's physical, mental, and economic well-being too. Natural catastrophes can destruct and displace entire communities, disrupt the infrastructures of cities, and weaken the economies of states. All these factors can fuel the suffering of masses in numerous ways; not just physically, but mentally and financially as well. Furthermore, it can take a lifetime for a family and decades for governments to overcome the destructions of that magnitude. This emphasizes the importance of disaster resiliance for safety and well-being of the citizens.
Controlling and preparing to mitigate natural disasters is necessary to minimize environmental issues and to ensure public health. Therefore, steps should be taken for disaster resiliance, otherwise the impact can be long-term, long-lasting, and difficult to overcome.
Submitted on July 26, 2024 at 1:10 PM
Overall Evaluation
7.5 Bands
Your essay effectively addresses the connection between disaster resilience, environmental conservation, and community well-being. You have a clear thesis and support your arguments with relevant examples. However, there are a few areas for improvement. Firstly, consider expanding on how disaster resilience specifically contributes to environmental conservation and community well-being, perhaps by including examples of successful disaster resilience strategies. Additionally, pay attention to spelling and grammar; for instance, 'communicaty safety' should be 'community safety', and 'fauna' is misspelled as 'fuana'. Moreover, diversifying your vocabulary could enhance the sophistication of your essay. Lastly, a conclusion that not only summarizes the key points but also reflects on the broader implications or offers a call to action could strengthen your argument. Overall, your essay is well-structured and addresses the topic comprehensively, but refining these aspects could improve its impact and clarity.
In this part of essay evaluation, state of the art AI and ML algorithms trained on millions of essays analyze how well you have performed on all fronts of IELTS writing task 2 band descriptors.
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7.5
Coherence & Cohesion
7.5 Bands
In this part of essay evaluation, the laser-focused algorithms meticulously examine your essay’s structure, ensuring your ideas flow logically and cohesively.
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Logical Organization
Your essay demonstrates a clear and logical structure, effectively exploring the connection between disaster resilience, environmental conservation, and community well-being. The flow from introduction to conclusion is smooth, with each paragraph dedicated to a specific aspect of the topic. Overall, the organization of ideas is coherent and contributes to the development of your argument. Band: 7.5
Good Sentence(s)
First and foremost, natural catastrophes directly threaten Earth's atmosphere, deteriorating it at a faster rate.
This sentence effectively introduces the paragraph topic, providing a clear and focused direction for the argument that follows.
Suggestions
To enhance logical progression, consider explicitly linking your paragraphs with transitional phrases that not only signal the next point but also show how it relates to the previous one. This will strengthen the cohesion of your essay.
Paragraphing
Your paragraphs are clear and well-structured, each focusing on a distinct aspect of the topic. The introduction, body paragraphs, and conclusion are all easily identifiable, contributing to the overall clarity of your essay. Band: 7.5
Good Sentence(s)
As for the community safety, natural disasters can have a direct and far-reaching effects on people's physical, mental, and economic well-being too.
This sentence effectively opens the paragraph, clearly stating its focus and setting the stage for the detailed discussion that follows.
Suggestions
To create more focused and coherent paragraphs, ensure that each paragraph sticks to one main idea. Use the first sentence to introduce the paragraph’s main idea and subsequent sentences to elaborate on it. This will help maintain clarity and focus throughout.
Cohesive Devices
Your use of cohesive devices is generally effective, helping to guide the reader through the essay. You have successfully used linking words to connect ideas within and between paragraphs. Band: 7.0
Good Sentence(s)
Therefore, it is extremely crucial to control these types of disruptions in nature in order to conserve the already-worsening climate.
This sentence effectively uses 'Therefore' to draw a conclusion from the previously mentioned points, clearly linking cause and effect.
Suggestions
To further improve your use of cohesive devices, consider varying them more to avoid repetition and to make connections between ideas even smoother. Additionally, experiment with more sophisticated devices, such as 'notwithstanding', 'in light of', and 'consequently', to add variety and depth to your writing.
Topic Sentences
Your topic sentences effectively set the stage for the paragraphs that follow, clearly indicating the direction of your argument.
Good Sentence(s)
First and foremost, natural catastrophes directly threaten Earth's atmosphere, deteriorating it at a faster rate.
This sentence effectively introduces the paragraph's focus on the environmental impact of natural disasters.
As for the community safety, natural disasters can have a direct and far-reaching effects on people's physical, mental, and economic well-being too.
It clearly transitions to discussing the human impact of disasters, maintaining a logical flow in your essay.
Suggestions
To write clear and impactful topic sentences, start with a concise summary of the paragraph's main point. Use active voice and specific language to directly convey the argument or analysis you will present.
Counter Points
Your essay does not explicitly address contrasting viewpoints or counterarguments, focusing instead on explaining the connection between disaster resilience, environmental conservation, and community well-being.
Bad Sentence(s)
Your essay lacks a section on contrasting viewpoints or counterarguments.
Corrected Sentence:
While disaster resilience and environmental conservation are crucial, some argue that the economic costs of such measures can be prohibitive, necessitating a balanced approach that considers both immediate and long-term benefits.
While disaster resilience and environmental conservation are crucial, some argue that the economic costs of such measures can be prohibitive, necessitating a balanced approach that considers both immediate and long-term benefits.
Consider including a paragraph that explores potential criticisms or alternative views on disaster resilience and environmental conservation, to provide a more balanced argument.
Suggestions
To effectively address and integrate counterarguments, acknowledge potential criticisms of your main points and provide evidence-based responses. This not only strengthens your argument but also demonstrates your understanding of the complexity of the issue.
Task Achievement
7.5 Bands
Overall, your essay successfully addresses the task, demonstrating a clear understanding of the topic and its implications. Your argument is well-developed, supported by relevant examples. To further improve, consider integrating more detailed evidence and exploring the interconnections between your main points in greater depth. Additionally, pay attention to minor spelling errors (e.g., 'resiliance' should be 'resilience', 'fuana' should be 'fauna') which can slightly detract from your credibility.
In this part of essay evaluation, the system evaluates how effectively your essay fulfills the given question, focusing on its relevance and comprehensiveness.
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Response to Question
You have effectively addressed the question by exploring the connection between disaster resilience, environmental conservation, and community well-being. Your essay provides a clear understanding of how natural disasters impact both the environment and public health, aligning well with the question's requirements.
Good example(s)
For instance, the smoke and fumes from the forest fires increase the air pollution; contributing to global warming, earthquakes can destroy the habitats of animals, and tsunamis can disrupt the life cycles of aquatic fuana.
This sentence effectively illustrates the direct impact of natural disasters on the environment, making your argument more tangible and understandable.
Development of Position
Your argument is clear and logically structured, demonstrating a strong connection between disaster resilience, environmental conservation, and community well-being. However, further elaboration on how these elements interconnect could strengthen your position.
Good example(s)
Controlling and preparing to mitigate natural disasters is necessary to minimize environmental issues and to ensure public health.
This sentence effectively summarizes your argument, reinforcing the importance of disaster resilience.
Supporting Details
Your examples are relevant and support your argument well. To enhance your essay, consider including specific studies or statistics that demonstrate the effectiveness of disaster resilience measures.
Good example(s)
Natural catastrophes can destruct and displace entire communities, disrupt the infrastructures of cities, and weaken the economies of states.
This detail effectively shows the broad impact of natural disasters on communities, supporting your argument about the importance of resilience.
Conclusion
Your conclusion reiterates the main points effectively but could be strengthened by suggesting specific actions or solutions for enhancing disaster resilience, environmental conservation, and community well-being.
Good example(s)
Therefore, steps should be taken for disaster resiliance, otherwise the impact can be long-term, long-lasting, and difficult to overcome.
This conclusion effectively summarizes the essay's main argument and emphasizes the importance of action.
Lexical Resources
6.5 Bands
Your essay demonstrates a good range of vocabulary relevant to the topic of natural disasters, environmental conservation, and community well-being. However, there is room for improvement in terms of precision and variety to enhance the overall impact of your message.
In this part of essay evaluation, the AI browses through 1,70,000+ words to analyze the diversity, suitability, and precision, reflecting high linguistic competence.
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Errors & Improvements
Based on the essay question, We have curated a list of suggested vocabulary that can improve the versatility of your writing skill. Utilise these words in your next essay to get your desired bands.
Lexical Mistakes
| Mistake | Correction | Reason |
|---|---|---|
| communicaty safety | community safety | Typographical error. |
| fuana | fauna | Spelling mistake. |
| resiliance | resilience | Spelling mistake. |
Repeated Words
| Repeated Words | Alternative Words |
|---|---|
natural disasters 5 times | natural catastrophes, environmental disasters, ecological crises |
environment 3 times | ecosystem, natural world, surroundings |
Vocabulary Suggestions
| Word Phrase | Meaning |
|---|---|
| mitigate Make less severe, serious, or painful. | Make less severe, serious, or painful. |
| sustainability The ability to be maintained at a certain rate or level. | The ability to be maintained at a certain rate or level. |
| ecological balance A state of dynamic equilibrium within a community of organisms in which genetic, species, and ecosystem diversity remain relatively stable, subject to gradual changes through natural succession. | A state of dynamic equilibrium within a community of organisms in which genetic, species, and ecosystem diversity remain relatively stable, subject to gradual changes through natural succession. |
| infrastructure resilience The ability of infrastructure systems to resist, absorb, accommodate, adapt to, transform, and recover from the effects of a hazard in a timely and efficient manner. | The ability of infrastructure systems to resist, absorb, accommodate, adapt to, transform, and recover from the effects of a hazard in a timely and efficient manner. |
| public health The health of the population as a whole, especially as monitored, regulated, and promoted by the state. | The health of the population as a whole, especially as monitored, regulated, and promoted by the state. |
Grammatical Range
7.5 Bands
Overall, your grammar is strong, with only minor errors that don't significantly hinder comprehension. Your essay demonstrates a good command of English grammar, contributing to the clarity and effectiveness of your argument. Paying attention to minor details like spelling and the correct form of nouns will further enhance your writing.
In this part of essay evaluation, the ML algorithms evaluate sentence structure, scrutinizing for grammatical precision and diversity — crucial for advanced language skills.
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Sentence Structures
Your sentences demonstrate a good variety and complexity, effectively contributing to the clarity and depth of your essay.
Good example(s)
For instance, the smoke and fumes from the forest fires increase the air pollution; contributing to global warming, earthquakes can destroy the habitats of animals, and tsunamis can disrupt the life cycles of aquatic fauna.
This sentence effectively uses a complex structure to list various impacts of natural disasters, showcasing variety in structure and the ability to convey multiple ideas smoothly.
Tense Usage
Your use of tenses is consistent and correct throughout the essay, maintaining a clear and coherent narrative flow.
Good example(s)
Controlling and preparing to mitigate natural disasters is necessary to minimize environmental issues and to ensure public health.
This sentence correctly uses the present tense to discuss ongoing and future actions, aligning well with the essay's focus on current issues and solutions.
Grammatical Errors
As for the communicaty safety, natural disasters can have a direct and far-reaching effects on people's physical, mental, and economic well-being too.
Correction:
As for community safety, natural disasters can have direct and far-reaching effects on people's physical, mental, and economic well-being too.
As for community safety, natural disasters can have direct and far-reaching effects on people's physical, mental, and economic well-being too.
Corrected 'communicaty' to 'community' for spelling accuracy and removed 'a' before 'direct and far-reaching effects' for grammatical correctness.
Natural catastrophes can destruct and displace entire communities, disrupt the infrastructures of cities, and weaken the economies of states.
Correction:
Natural catastrophes can destroy and displace entire communities, disrupt the infrastructure of cities, and weaken the economies of states.
Natural catastrophes can destroy and displace entire communities, disrupt the infrastructure of cities, and weaken the economies of states.
Changed 'destruct' to 'destroy' for correct verb usage and 'infrastructures' to 'infrastructure' for correct noun form.